Now I hear you speaking when You speak with a soft voice
Before I did not hear You speaking loud into me
Your voice, oh Lord, changed my whole style, my life, my opinion about living
It brought a bright new light into my kingdom within, into my perceptions of things
Nothing remained as it was before, all changed into something I could never figure out myself
“For thou art my lamp, O LORD: and the LORD will lighten my darkness”, 2Sam.22:29.
I can hear you, now, when you speak about me, even when it is hard to hear
You changed my stubborn heart into something you can speak against so You can change it into beauty
And because I can bear you against me, I will hear You speak for me without changing for the worst.
The devil changed because You delighted in him and spoke of his beauty
And I will not change again because you have a hold upon my whole heart and being.
Indeed, all is so new I can’t know it, it feels as if I am indeed dead, living for Your sake alone
You have given me all and I can’t live without it anymore
Nor can I live with it without Your precious care and real presence within and without
It is impossible to know myself without You now
Just as it is impossible to know You without Yourself
There is nothing I care about which is not Yours
Therefore, Lord, I plead today: give me whatever would be mine otherwise because You approved it
For, unless it comes from you I might not desire any of it anymore and sin that way.
I need Your Light in my whole being, Your approval, Your power to live by in the tiniest thing there is
And unless it is so, I will not desire it: I am in great need to know it comes from You by Your working
I can’t live without You anymore, Lord, because I am new everyday
And I can’t know what it is You desire of me unless I can hear and see You desiring it all within me.
Take Your seat all the time in my heart and stay there for always
Make your home desirable even to You, Your care always visible and touching
Make me aware of reality alone and let me despise good and bad things which do not have You in them. Amen.
José Mateus