(Introduction)(Dial.1)(Dial.2)(Dial.3)(Dial.4)(Dial.5)(Dial.6)DIALOGUE 7(Dial.8)(Dial.9)(Dial.10)

(Dial.11)(Dial.12)(Dial.13)(Dial.14)(Dial.15)(Dial.16)(Dial.17)(Dial.18)(Dial.19)(Dial.20)

FASTING AND PRAYING

DIRTY_C: I pray quite a lot when I am not discouraged and God never answers me. Can you explain why God does that to me?

CLEAN_C: How do you pray?

DIRTY_C: I have prayed in many ways. I have fasted; I have asked my church brothers to pray for me; and I’ve even cried my heart out in church. Until today, I have received no answer from God ever, as far as I am aware. Everyone was moved in church because of me; and my brothers’ hearts went out for me when I asked them to pray for me as well. But, it seemed God’s heart did not move towards me as my brothers’ did. Even so, I heard many people promise in the name of God I would be helped. Today, I consider those people liars, because nothing happened as they told me it would. They said: “God will bless you my brother!” But nothing happened till now! I don’t know where they heard it from or who told them God would bless me.

CLEAN_C: That is very strange. I find it so sad when people say God does not hear them. Sometimes, it is so hard to figure out why it happens to them. That’s not what happens to me. Usually, even before I start praying, I sense God answering me. It feels He reveals His mind as soon as He reads my mind and my meditations. It happened quite often that I got the answer even before I could say a word to God. One day, I knelt down to intercede for a certain woman and God answered me the moment my knees reached the floor. And I hadn’t spoken a word yet. (Is. 65:24). I am so sorry to hear about your experience. I cannot understand it.

DIRTY_C: That’s not what happens to me! I feel like screaming sometimes! The only reason I do not scream is because I believe God is not deaf. He must be hearing me alright. Perhaps He simply refuses to answer. Maybe He doesn’t feel comfortable with me. Oh brother, I am a desperate man! I don’t know what else I can do! If God does not answer me, to whom shall I turn?

CLEAN_C: Perhaps you should think of cleansing yourself thoroughly first and leave these enquiries and requests for later. You must cleanse your whole life and soul once and for all. The quicker you do that, the easier God shall hear prayers, I believe. I believe at this point you do everything else, except the one thing that is really demanded from you! That way shall lead you to faithlessness because God won’t answer! It usually ends there. The Bible says that an unclean conscience ends up in shipwreck. And it so happens for many reasons. It says: “...holding faith and a good conscience, which some have put away and made shipwreck concerning faith”, 1Tim.1:19. That’s why many people cry and shout to God and receive no answer. I believe we yell and scream to anyone who is afar off. Some yell at those who make them angry as well. I don’t believe screaming will help you out at all because you are either far from Him or angry at Him.

DIRTY_C: But, I am not angry with God. God forbid! May He have mercy on me! I respect God! I fear to do that! I always speak to the Lord as an educated man would speak to anyone. But, not even so God hears me! Do you think it happens to a lot of people, brother?

CLEAN_C: Why you keep calling me brother?

DIRTY_C: If we believe in the same Father, I suppose we are brothers, aren’t we?

CLEAN_C: I see. Maybe we are brothers, I don’t know. It is not that I don’t wish to be your brother, but, we should speak truthfully to one another. I don’t think of it as a normal thing that God does not hear prayers. It can’t be seen as normal, unless God rejects you for some reason.

DIRTY_C: Yes, I believe you are right. We seem to be so different from each other that it is quite hard to regard you as my brother. Bothers are usually alike, and even more if they are twins.

CLEAN_C: “Can two walk together unless they are agreed?” Amos3:3. I don’t know if we are that different either. I can’t figure it out as well. I cannot call you brother without thinking I might not be truthful to you; and neither can I say you are not my brother without feeling the same way. We shouldn’t lie to each other or to ourselves concerning others.

DIRTY_C: But, why are we so different? We believe in the same God, right?

CLEAN_C: I don’t know. I believe it is because we are looking at truth from different perspectives. I might look at truth as an encouragement and you as a discouraging accusation. It feels to me you are on that side of truth, and I find myself on this side. I can’t explain how it feels, but I wish we could call each other “brother” without lying.

DIRTY_C: It is so strange that I don’t feel hurt when you say such things. It feels you are very sincere about the whole issue. I can read sincerity in your eyes. It feels you would really love it to be my brother and by questioning it as you do opens a door for us to find a way to be children of the same spirit. I feel you are a truthful person and not an offensive man. Now I understand why my friends do not like talking to you. They always feel offended in some way by your words. You are too truthful for them! Now I understand! You use the same words differently. Your heart expresses itself in another way when you speak and use the same words they use when annoyed. You have another way with words, indeed.

CLEAN_C: I don’t know what you are talking about. What could I say? I hate to speak things which are not truthful. I feel we should never lie to people and neither to ourselves. To love truth is one of those conditions God demands from us to be heard above about anything. God shall never deny any truthful being. We need to have a truthful heart in the overall life to be heard in prayer.

DIRTY_C: Could you tell me why truth is not accepted as truth when we apply force to speak the truth? You do not apply force to it.

CLEAN_C: I would say forced truth is not truth, at least not to ourselves. But, I would say that anyone forced to speak the truth is not a truthful person, not even when his mouth is driven to say the truth. Can you think of a thirsty man being forced to drink? When people are caught up in a corner and they can’t deny the truth anymore, it does not make them truthful. It is a different thing altogether to speak the truth spontaneously and without performing and touching it up. And when others perform, it tempts us to guess about their motives and hearts all the time. It is a stumbling block both for the hearer and the speaker.

DIRTY_C: What do you mean? What do you mean by guessing about others? I don’t understand.

CLEAN_C: Every time we force truth for others to hear us, whoever hears us gets the impression we are not convinced about what we are saying or that we are trying to cover up the liar in us by forcing truth down the throat. It could also be understood that we would rather tell a lie than speak the truth. By forcing truth upon ourselves, we reveal we are not comfortable with it and that we are afraid others take us for liars. Forced truth or lying is about the same thing. In fact, forcing truth might be seen as a cover up for a lying heart. We cannot do that to people and much less to God. In fact, chances are that if we do that to people, we shall also do the same to God. Ananiah and Saphira died because they lied to God. We should always be what we are and not change according to circumstances or people. If we force ourselves to speak the truth, surely, we shall most easily lie as soon as we are distracted from our guard. We must be truthful and we shall avoid lying altogether because lying is not our nature when we are truthful. Only then shall we not fear the temptations to lie. Besides, God sees us as we are and we should be as God sees us. If we are truthful, then God shall answer, surely. He won’t deny truth coming from the inner man. If we are not truthful and patient, we shall easily be tempted to guess what is in God’s mind and what His answer would or could be. This is why many speak up in the name of God and use His holy name in vain. Then, would God speak and hear us, it would be very disappointing for us to hear Him say no to any request.

DIRTY_C: This is not that difficult to understand.

CLEAN_C: No, it isn’t.

DIRTY_C: But, sometimes I think this way: the demons asked God to get into the pigs, right? And Jesus granted them their request. We could say God answered their prayer. They were demons and God answered them. Could I be worse than a demon? Why would Jesus not answer my requests as He did theirs? I can’t carry on lying to myself! I can’t go on saying I believe God will answer me anymore. I don’t know if He will. Can you understand me? Am I too critical to think of myself worse off than a demon in the sight of God?

CLEAN_C: I can understand you, yes. I guess I would feel that way myself if God refused to hear what He promised to hear. The only thing I believe you shouldn’t do is blaming God for what is happening to you right now. I am sure there is nothing wrong on God's side. I believe there are things in your life, either recent or old, which causes God to close down His ears for you. You should cleanse yourself first, before thinking about any kind of request or even about anything you would wish to talk to God about. You need to make a thorough cleansing of your whole being first, bringing all past and present sins to the light, one by one. That’s the first thing you should do. Jesus praises those people who wash themselves in His blood and upholds them faithfully each day.  

DIRTY_C: You know that not even fasting works with me? Do you fast often? I think you must fast a lot if God answers you even before you talk to Him! On the other hand, if God answers you that way, why would fast at all? Oh, I am confused. Please forgive me for being this way today.

CLEAN_C: Confusion is a leak in our soul and heart by which faith is drained out. But, a leak is there only because something is broken. And if your relationship with God is broken, you shall be confused, especially when you try to understand how the things of the Spirit work. There must be some dirt inside your heart that stains your conscience and which greatly hinders or annoys God. You should start there and find out what separates you from the Lord. Only then can you be heard by Him and hear from Him as well.

DIRTY_C: Sometimes I think of giving up the whole idea of God. It starts to feel like an idea only. However, what I want to abandon does not abandon me! It follows me everywhere! It pursues me all the time.

CLEAN_C: You shouldn’t be angry against God if His mercy hunts you down that way. You should be thankful God has not given up on you yet. Weren’t you saying God doesn’t hear you? Well, there you are! He keeps knocking, doesn’t He? Perhaps you are the one who is not hearing Him about something He wishes to discuss with you urgently. I have always believed that if God does not hear us about something, He must be talking about something else we don’t want to hear about. Anyway, as long as His mercy follows you, you won’t experience any peace, at least until you clean up your whole life. Just as God said, “Let there be light” and there was light, He also said “There is no peace for the ungodly” and there shall never be any peace for anyone who does not cleanse his whole life thoroughly, Is.57:21. This is an eternal law, that we won't have real peace when our heart is stained by something. And God sees it as good also, just as He saw light was good. That decree against ungodliness still works today because it is an eternal decree, just as the sun’s is and it still shines today.

DIRTY_C: I want to know more about fasting. Tell me, do you fast often?

CLEAN_C: I do yes, but only when I am led to do so. God leads into fasting.

DIRTY_C: How so? God leads people to fast and pray?

CLEAN_C: Yes, of course He does! How else would we know what God’s will is and how would we pray according to it? We shall be heard only by praying according to God’s will.

DIRTY_C: Oh, I feel more confused now.

CLEAN_C: Jesus was taken into the desert to fast for forty days and forty nights, wasn’t He? It is said Jesus was led by the Spirit to do so. We also read in Scriptures about God asking people, “When you come to appear before Me, who has required this at your hand, to trample My courts?”, Is.1:12. This means God requires it from us. If God needs to transmit us something, or if He needs to prepare us for something, He shall call upon us to fast and pray. We also read in the New Testament that the Spirit is able to groan and travail inside us. It means He leads us to achieve all those things which are His will.

DIRTY_C: You mean we may never fast unless God leads us to do so?

CLEAN_C: If the fasting you are doing is not according to God’s leadings, how shall you ever know God shall hear you? God would simply say, “Is it such a fast that I have chosen? A day for a man to afflict his soul? Is it to bow down his head like a bulrush, and to spread sackcloth and ashes under him? Will you call this a fast and a day pleasing to the Lord?” Is.58:5. You should fast sin! Abstaining from food is not as good as abstaining from sin. That is why the Lord further says, “Is not this the fast that I have chosen? To loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed ones go free, and that you break every yoke?” Is.58:6. That is the kind of fasting you should try! Then, the rest shall be added unto you, because that’s where the kingdom of God will be confirmed and God will choose to rule.

DIRTY_C: In other words, we cannot fast whenever we wish to?

CLEAN_C: You can if you are clean before God. But, it cannot be regarded as a good thing, especially if your eyes can’t be set where God’s are set. How can you pursue what He wants when He is not leading you to it? You cannot do two things at one time. How will you ever exercise faith without knowing what the Lord wants? He is the one who Works in us to will and to do according to His will. You should rather on hearing Him, on following Him and obeying Him - not on sacrificing yourself.

DIRTY_C: And how does it work? How does God do that in us? How does He lead?

CLEAN_C: We need to make sure He is our comforter and helper every moment of our existence. If He is, He shall surely lead us in the right way at the right timing. It is us that fast and pray, but God needs to be with us right where we are. He needs to be there in what we do so that He can hear us. Own-minded people shall never be lead into prayer because they have their own mind about what they need to do and, also, about the will of God. but, were they honest, they would realize they are after their own will their own way and wish God to follow them. They will always tell God what His will should be. And by being led by God, we shall never be late or be ahead of Him. We shall walk as He walks. Our steps will be lead through His. Only when you are led by God, can you consider yourself a child of God. “For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God”, Rom.8:14. This portion of Scripture says that anyone who is not led by God can’t be a child of His, not even when we considers himself as such. It is not we who decide we are the sons of God. There is more to becoming a child of God than one can think of.

DIRTY_C: I understand. If it is so, I am in deep trouble, I think. I have never felt led by God in any way, much less in fasting and praying. That is why I always believed it is a useless sacrifice to fast, anyway. It would bring me no fruit and no peace inside. It took me nowhere. Never did it take me anywhere.

CLEAN_C: I am sorry to hear that. Fasting cannot be considered a trade where people get some reward from the Lord by fasting. Fasting can and may serve as a time given exclusively to God to change us thoroughly and to work His will in us. He may use that time of fasting to better prepare us for something He is aiming at. Fasting is able to work a huge transformation in us because we walk into the presence of God and stay there. Remaining there faithfully, and by seeing Him, we shall be changed into His likeness. Fasting does not make God hear us – it makes us hear and see God. But, if we are indeed led to spend some time alone with God, we shall surely be renewed or changed during that period. That’s the whole point of fasting.

DIRTY_C: I thought all people who fasted a lot were saints! Now it sounds to me most are sinful. It seems to me fasting can be sin.

CLEAN_C: Whoever fasts when led by the Lord, may be turned into a saint during that period. But, it may also turn people into worse sinners than they have ever been before. It depends if God is leading them or not. Man cannot lead himself into something good. Man is too own-minded to achieve that sort of goodness by leading himself. If you ever wish to pray the right way, you must get into the presence of God by going through the door and by refusing to jump over the wall into the sheepfold. You need to be led by the Spirit of God if your fasting is ever to mean something to you or to anyone else. Unless the Spirit leads, you might hear words such as these: “Friend, how did you come in here without having a wedding garment?” And you shall also be speechless when thrown out. (Mat. 22:12).

(Introduction)(Dial.1)(Dial.2)(Dial.3)(Dial.4)(Dial.5)(Dial.6)DIALOGUE 7(Dial.8)(Dial.9)(Dial.10)

(Dial.11)(Dial.12)(Dial.13)(Dial.14)(Dial.15)(Dial.16)(Dial.17)(Dial.18)(Dial.19)(Dial.20)